Xterra Beaver Creek 2019
I will add pictures as the become available. I’ve been on a path of Xterra this year. Actually since my Croc run at 11k after Breck 100 last July. A good friend of mine, wanted to do the World Championships for her 50th, which we didn’t do, so I thought, this would make for a great 50th birthday for myself. I went in October of 2006. 13 years, ago. Wow. I wrote about it back then, which I have included below for your reading “pleasure”.
The interesting part of 2006, is we were on a technological advance on tubeless tires. We weren’t all convinced it was the way to go. I knew the course was rough, shredding tubes, so I carried 3. I gave one away, and had 3 flats. the math was not so good. The experience was.
The Trials and Tribulations Of an Endurance Athlete
The day is Sunday October 29th, 2006 and it’s the 10th Anniversary of Xterra World Championship, in Maui. What drives an amateur athlete to choose an event of such caliber and what drives them to train and achieve their goals? For me it’s an individual challenge to push myself to the next level of fitness. Every year I like to choose an event harder than the last; always working harder, getting faster. I love triathlons, and I love mountain biking so Xterra is the perfect fit. I love climbing; I love climbing hills, steep hills, hard hills, this became my drive to climb Heartbreak Hill. The only way to climb Heartbreak Hill is to participate in the hardest triathlon in the world against the best athletes in the world, so I signed up.
Time was passing and I hadn’t heard whether or not I had been accepted in the open draw. I was beginning to think I was going to have to put in the work to get there. I didn’t want that. I wanted to be fresh, strong. I wanted the advantage. Finally, word came in that I was one of about 6 women that were chosen. What an honor and truly a privilege.
My training had started three years ago when the idea first entered my mind but now was the time to fine tune it all and I spent a year getting faster, especially focusing on my run. I peaked well and I peaked strong with 11 mile road runs, 9 mile trail runs, 4 hour rides and two mile swims. It was all perfect training for a perfect race. I had potential for the podium and that was my secret.
2006 Xterra World Championships; Chris, Richard and I were prepared to swim with 575 of our closest personal friends on a mass start. I let Chris talk me into starting in the front, and she let me talk her into starting right of the buoys, current. It was perfect, breathing, waves; I was focusing on the bottom of the ocean in the crystal clear waters of Maui. Then, the first buoy, which 500 people trying to get around it became worse than rush hour traffic. As I yelled, “c’mon everyone, let’s remember to be nice” the masses relaxed enough to flow around the buoy. After all, everyone competing has the same goal: to finish with a fast time.
I came out of the water after a second lap with a PR open water, non wetsuit swim. I ran, ready for my bike excited to hit my favorite and strongest event. Everything was going great, strong legs, great focus.
No one ever knows what is going to happen race day, 1.3 miles into the bike, CRASH! I jumped back up like nothing happened; it took some time to register the pain. Everything hurt, every pedal stroke, every down hill, every contraction, and then, mile 4 Heartbreak Hill. The moment I’ve been waiting for the last three years. Yes, we’re a third up. Oh, touch down in front of me, dismount and a few steps forward. I remount with more than a third left, I can do this. I hear comments about the clear; almost, is my response. That feeds me.
Shortly thereafter, my rear tire flats. I find shade, because I know that it will matter. My arm hurts so bad I ask for water to clean it to make sure all the bones are still inside. Someone asks for a tube, I know her, she’s already used her one tube, and her CO2 so I give her one of mine and my pump. After all, there’s no way I can go through 3 tubes; especially with my near perfect mechanical free race history. Okay, everybody just passed me.
I’m back on the bike, it’s not much further and I hear an explosion in my rear tire. I find shade, pull off and start the process. Explosion of air gushes from another rider’s tire. The support team then walks up the trail, pulls off a flat rock with a machete lip on it, tire slime included. Okay, no tubes left, but I’m sure I’ll be okay. I make it another mile or so, flat tire. Well, I’m at mile 11, finally at the end of the merciless climb. I find shade and check for self sealant to work, no luck. So what other option do I have but walk with my friend the Spaniard, who knows no English. The conversation is lacking because I know little Spanish but we are enjoying our space at 1400 feet above sea level. We are looking out at the highest point of Maui, 10,000 feet above sea level across the ocean. This makes it all worth it. My friend stops and picks up a deer skull, I try to communicate with him that I can help him mount it, we keep walking. One rider passes, no communication; another rider passes, communication, he is going to give me a tube. The Spaniard has a double flat and is enjoying his walk. I find shade, change the tube and I’m off! The downhill is slow, cautious. If there is any hope for me, it’s to make it down alive, without another flat. I’m not sure if I’ll be able to run. I ask the last bike feed, I have 25 minutes. I’m not sure if I can make it. It’s already 30 minutes past the transition close time. My hope is beginning to dwindle. It’s beginning to seem that I will not be able make it, that I’ll DNF. This would be the first race I have thought about quitting and was happy about it. I realized it’s not really my decision. I will let them decide, I have never quit. The only thing that would stop me is a mechanical, or an injury, don’t I have both? The mind can play games. So I sing, “Put one foot in front of the other foot and soon I’ll be walking out the door”.
The closer and closer I get to transition, the happier I become. I hit the road and into the golf course…can I run?!? Yes, go for it, go run. I run to my shoes, grab my fuel belt and my Tylenol. I’m distracted, disturbed, and in pain. I know the Tylenol will kick in but at this point I’m still trying to overcome the feeling of wanting to quit. I begin to pass people, this is encouraging to me. I offer my pain reliever, they are overcoming different obstacles. They have managed to persevere. I swallow my pride and get into my pace. It’s fast, strong, intermittent with short walks. 3 miles into the run, which is all climb; I’m back in my zoene, relaxed and the pain has decreased substantially. There’s still pain with every step but I am grateful for all that I have overcome. I learned lessons along the way. I enjoyed the spectacular views on the bike, mostly off. I crossed the line with a strong sprint, feeling great, happier than I have ever felt in my entire life. It’s not about the podium… It’s about the effort and working with what’s given to us.
Of course, I’m still recovering from the feelings of disappointment but I didn’t quit, I stuck with it and because I choose to finish, because I could finish; that makes me my own personal winner. I won the power to overcome any obstacle that is presented to me during any race I do. And the podium, it just wasn’t in the stars for me. I got the greatest gift of all; the hardest workout in my life. I learned how to overcome the psychological aspects of racing, I had a really great time, and I’m so glad I finished. The turtle always wins.
Present Day: in 2013
I qualified for Worlds in 2011, for whatever reason, was not able to go.
Sometimes you have it, sometimes you don’t. We cannot control all of the outcomes of our lives; we can only control some, and how we re-act to a particular circumstance. Some people quit races when they don’t go their way, me, I like to persevere.
One day, I will be a World Champion. I have my whole life, until then, I will just continue to do what I love.
An interesting tid bit, is I had lava rock come out of my elbow a few years ago from that crash. And I still wear the scar proudly.
Now 2019 I got in on open draw to race Maui. It’s the 1st time in years I have actually trained for a specific event(s). It’s not always fun, I am getting faster, in each event, the results are paying off.
This weekend was no different.
I had a case of Pre-Race Pneumonia the week before. We had had 4 days of hard riding in Colorado, and had some meals out. With the Celiac’s I did come down with something. I have made a new pact. No eating out for 4 weeks before an important event. Drastic, I know. So is getting sick, unnecessarily, when you’re in a big training block.
Part of our days of riding was Pre-Riding the course. Man, I am glad we did, it was beautiful, and it would have made my race very distracting. I also, knew exactly where everything was, and I was able to change my tires to a Maxxis 2.2 Ikon from the 2.35 Ardent Races.
I stayed at the Comfort Suites. I wasn’t too comfortable. I had to call on a smoker, not once, but twice. Woke up at 4:22, and went about my business. Got to T2 about 630, set up at Beaver Creek Village, and rode my bike down. This made it challenging, as I need to make sure I had everything I needed for the next 2.5 hours.
Epic fail, I forgot to put my quad espresso with 5 teaspoons of sugar in T2. I put my shoes, and everything I needed for the run, right at Run Out. Practice ran it a couple of times, and then headed down to T1.
Got set up right near Bike Out. That’s the advantage of being early. You get to choose your spot, and then chillax. I ate the rest of my breakfast. I have recently tweaked a recipe from the dude that founded Skratch Labs. I will likely be sharing it on Zoefitness FB page in the next week or so. I love them! And so easy, every day, for Master Swim, and races like this one. aka Ninja Trip.
The water was 67.5 I got in, and did my warm up. I had to open my suit a couple of inches in the back so I wouldn’t over heat. It’s a problem wearing double caps because of a latex allergy. I was ready. 15 Minutes to race time.
This is by far one of the greatest Open Water Swim Venues I have ever participated in. We had mass start with All Women, and the 50+ men. It was a little congested, and I was just going to have MY swim. The water was so clean, and since it’s really just a pond, no waves. The Championship Course was two laps around. Although you can see the bottom, you can’t touch. I saw, 2 pairs of goggles, and a phone at the bottom. It was a hoot. I felt good on the swim, I swam a 26:42 which was the fastest in my AG. I did try to increase my speed several times, to no avail, the extra 1200 feet in elevation, really made a difference on my HR response in the water.
My coach may be a little disappointed in me, as I chose to keep my watch running, on my bike, in bike mode. I have fought to get my suit off over the watch, and with Garmin, it doesn’t get as good of a signal under the wet suit. It was pretty tough to figure out my actual bike time.
I had a great bike! I felt strong, my field of vision was spot on. I passed 2nd place on the 1st downhill section. I have no power data, as my Quarq for some reason decided not to work. I may have pushed a little hard on the bike, as my HR was high and consistent. I was very please in my performance. My watch had me coming in about 158-159, Strava has my moving time at 203, on TP, it looks like it’s at 201.
I came into T2, and although I rehearsed, and knew I was at Run Out, I could NOT find my shoes! I literally wandered around, from anywhere between 5 and 8 minutes looking for them. My shoes are black, all cycling shoes are black, everyone has hydration. I finally found what I was looking for, someone had placed their bike, right on top of my shoes. It was frustrating. And 100% my fault. Once I found my things, I headed out, my transition to run, went well, legs were tired, and were moving, not the usual thickness I have had in the last few years, when I haven’t been training. I had not seen any of the run course. I knew the elevation profile. There were some good sections of 20-25% as we parallel corkscrew for some time. I knew, having lost so much time in T2 my hope for a podium was lost. As my running is not up to par. 50, and 53 minutes into the run, I had two 50’s pass me. Dammit! Nothing I could, except, let them go. Had I not floundered, they would have not passed me. It’s disappointing, because I know better, and I also found a way, to NOT have that happen again. I finished in 347 and some change. I pushed myself as hard as I could, came through the line, walked it off, had many WTF moments, and leaned over a planter, and had a couple of bouts of release tears. I’m happy with my athletic performance, even if my execution was not perfect. Pretty stoked to have 6 weeks of training to amp up for Nationals.
So that’s the story of me losing my shoes, I didn’t know where they were at, couldn’t find them. It was sad, it was not supposed to be my day.
The Darkness
I have been wanting to talk about the darkness for awhile It is a difficult topic to discuss. Yet, many of us have it, or have had it. And a lot of people don’t want to talk about it.
First off, if a lot of us have had it, or do have it, then, why is it so difficult to talk about?!?!
I have had a lot of darkness in my life. Mostly in my early adolescence, my teenage years, and even into my early 20s.
I have seen a lot of darkness. I have seen things, and been around things, that are too dark even for movies. The kind of stuff you can’t make up, and probably wouldn’t believe if you heard it.
Often times the Darkness is self medicated. Generally with substances, that can make you feel really good for a short time, and then, make you feel worse. Everything from alcohol, to any number of hard drugs. And then, starts the cycle of addiction, and with addiction comes more Darkness, and people who also live in Darkness. So it becomes this hamster wheel, of not feeling like there’s an escape from the Darkness.
I have been blessed in many ways, I was not dealt the addiction card, and although I struggled with alcohol in the 1st part of my darkness, when I was still in high school, I have always managed to be able to cut free of addiction.
So there is a lot I know about the Darkness. I know how I got into the Darkness. I grew up not knowing I was loved. I grew up feeling I was a constant disappointment. I never felt like I was enough. I also, had un-diagnosed celiac’s disease. Which contributed to the Darkness. I was a teenager, who was an outsider, who didn’t feel love, who’s brain was not receiving the proper nutrition to be healthy. And I was compiling that with alcohol, which in turn (as a depressant) made me even more depressed.
I went off to college, and I fought the Darkness while I was there. I was like Eeyore with the dark gloom every where I went. And although I was having a battle with the darkness the entire time, I knew there were flickers of light that came through.
I had been consumed with Darkness, and on my 21st birthday I was “done” I was the designated driver, and I drove my friends around and gave them my shots.
And this became the exit hole from the Darkness.
The Darkness came to me because when I was 16. I had bone, on bone in both knees, and the DR wanted to put me in a wheel chair. I lost everything I ever identified with. I lost my athleticism. Sometimes, we choose to not be active, and sometimes, it is taken away from us. Regardless, if we are not aware of the Darkness, it will consume us, if we are not careful. Exercise is the most under prescribed anti-depressant. And because of my experiences, it has made the person I am today.
I moved to New Mexico to go back to school. And I saw more, and more of the Light. When people ask me where I grew up, I tell them, New Mexico. I still had a lot of Darkness in my life, and I also knew, I had the power to control it.
I found Science of Mind, and began a practice. I learned, that if I changed my thoughts, I could change my life. I knew that I had the Power of the Mind to control my thoughts, and my feelings.
The Darkness continued to be a part of who I was, in the sense, that for some reason, it was still around me, through some of my relationships.
The hard thing to understand is the Darkness, is a choice. And we can either change the way we think, or continue on the path of unhappiness, and self medication.
Or we can choose to be happy.
And being happy is simple.
It’s as easy as waking up in the morning, and saying,
I am happy, today I choose happiness.
You are the Light.
I don’t ever want anyone to forget this.
I am the Light.
You are the Light.
And when you embrace the Light there can be no Darkness.
So let go, and be Free, and know, you are a perfect child of Light.
Thanks for checking in. TTYL, and please check back for action photos!
Coach Zoe