What does Caveman say, “Keep on, Keeping on”?
A lot of other people say it too, it’s a song, and such.
But I can’t help but think that sums it up.
It’s a lonely road right now,
A Very Lonely Road
A very lonely road that weeps of sorrow.
If there was one person in the world,
just one,
that was going through what I was going through,
or had a small incline of what I’ve been going through.
I once wrote an article: per my Team Captain: Jay Ellis
“The Trials and Tribulations of an Endurance Athlete”.
This was a race review of my experiences in Maui at the Xterra World Championship. What defines an athlete.
Jay wanted me to explain to the Team the mental game, the challenges, the success that we experience when we choose NOT to DNF a race. More athletes will choose in the face of adversity to quit a race, versus toughing it out.
- I had 3 flats, had given my 3rd tube to Lisa from Durango, who had a phenomenal finish, I even helped her change her tire.
- Thus, had to push my bike miles, adding 1.5 hours to my MTN Bike split
Did I stop?
No!
Did I give up?
No!
Why? When most athletes would have thrown in the towel, called it quits taken the DNF, what makes me different?
My will for survival.
And you know what?!? Just guess…
I came across the finish line in Maui!! One of the most exciting experiences of my life, one that defines me as a person and a coach.
Life can be such a challenge, and what are you going to do when it gets tough?
QUIT?!?!
No, I don’t think so. I have never cared, oh, my time is going to be slow, oh, I should just give up. Oh, this hurts, or that hurts.
NO!
I never quit.
I never give up.
I have never given up in my life. I’m a fighter.
But in the face adversity, when you do feel like you’re alone in the world, it’s hard to put that smiling face on, and recognize:
- Surely I’m not alone
- Surely there is someone out there, anybody…
who had had to quit their job, leave their friends, be sick forever, and abandon their dream home, and leave their husband to be well.
There really is someone out there going through the same thing I am, isn’t there???
Please,
I need support.
The part that hurts the most about all of it: Corporations aren’t people, they don’t have our best interests at heart, and the industry continues to not only make me be here, and my husband there, but continues to pretend that everything is okay.
I had a great week last week: as far as my training goes:
Sunday: skied with the monkeys: littlest monkey, “it’s fun to go fast”. This is huge since, she was knocked unconscious at Wolf Creek, and has hated skiing since.
Saturday, busy family day.
Friday: yes, therapy day: And oh, what good therapy it was:
Thursday, I think, I took the day off to run errands and have my hand looked at. I should probably blog about that too.
I have a cyst or a foreign body in my hand. It’s been there for probably years. I massaged it a few months ago, thinking it was calcification and I wanted to break it up. Well, that made it worse.
It makes my hand weak, and sometimes difficult to hold onto the bars. The DR:
“let’s put a needle in that to see what comes out”
“Let’s cut it open and see what it is” Here, I’m assuming he’s talking about a referral, I felt like saying, “here’s my swiss army knife, let’s go after it!
“It shouldn’t make your hand weak, most of the muscles are in your forearm.”
Oh, I’m sorry, I guess you didn’t know that the tendons are attached to the muscle and that inflammation can lead to impingement on the neurons.
I said, “No ONE is cutting into me before we know what it is! Let’s take an XRay.”
There’s a good chance an XRay won’t show anything. I’m thinking, it’ll show calcification, metal objects. Then, I can go for a)MRI b)Ultrasound.
Those things will show a foreign body, won’t they?!? And if it’s a cysts. Insert rolling eyes here.
Wednesday I ran 1:20 off road, on rolling, mountainous terrain.
Tuesday rode for 3:45. Including a 20 minute Zone 3-4 and a 30 minute TT at the end.
Monday, well, it’s here again, and I have to get my ass off the couch and away from my computer to go run, and be free!